Originally recorded in 1979, this is Chris and Peet’s first song ever. Recorded during our pre-radio days, when we were still doing our fake radio shows from our basement radio station WKID. Yes, we were geeks, but it kept us off the streets.  This was a shameless effort to ride the coattails of our radio idols Steve Dahl and Garry Meier who had just pulled off Disco Demolition at White Sox field Comiskey Park.  Disco by this point was at least on life support.

Now at age 55 as we get ready for the big 40th anniversary release of Cow Dung and Chicken Tongue, I have remade this awful classic.   Why?  Because I can.

Uber Friend is the second single from Phillip’s long-awaited sophomore album, Break Loose. Uber Friend was inspired during the Covid-19 lockdown when Phillip rarely left his house and relied on Uber Eats and other food delivery services for his meals. This is a sentimental song about Phillip’s friendship with a particular Uber Eats driver.

Lyrics:

One more towel wipe across my head
I’ll tell you what’s going down
Got my glucose meter and my stretch pants too
I open Uber Eats and go to town
I place my order and I hit submit
And check the wait time…45 minutes

CHORUS
I track his route on GPS
There’s nose prints on the window glass
My tummy is turning but I can’t tell
If it’s the butterflies or that I haven’t eaten since twelve
He’s got my food in hand
Here comes my Uber Friend

A pepperoni pizza and a side of hot wings
A chimichanga dinner with chips!
It won’t be long before my buddy arrives
And my hearty feast meets my lips
I check my order status to see if it’s time
But it’s been a minute
And my stomach is whining

CHORUS
I track his route on GPS
There’s nose prints on the window glass
My tummy is turning but I can’t tell
If it’s the butterflies or that I haven’t eaten since twelve
He’s got my food in hand
Here comes my Uber Friend

BRIDGE

We’ve gotten rather close you see
There’s details that he knows of me
Details that he says he did not need
He fills my every need
Bringing dinner, that’s the deed!
He’s lucky that’s me he feeds
With what I order you should see the fees!

CHORUS
I track his route on GPS
There’s nose prints on the window glass
My tummy is turning but I can’t tell
If it’s the butterflies or that I haven’t eaten since twelve

He’s got my food in hand
You’d think that he’s Superman
He’s bringing soup and bread
Here comes my Uber Friend
It’s my Uber Friend

© 2021 SmorgShow Productions, Music and Lyrics by Phillip Donald

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Phillip Donald has completed his first new recording in 6 years. The song ‘Break Loose’ was written during Phillip’s 6-month stay in a federal penitentiary. Phillip was convicted of lewd public behavior in April 2018 and was sentenced to one year in prison. Phillip was released on parole 6 months early and came out to perform his song for the SmorgShow gang on their 100th episode.

Lyrics:

I’m not the kind of guy you think I am

Sophisticated all around I even roast yams

So don’t you say I don’t have class

I’m not the roaming creep that they say I am

Don’t make your accusations just because I drive a van

They took my every pound of dignity

How many times do I have to say

It’s not me that you should be taking away

I’ve got three bags of candy still left inside

But officers are clear about taking bribes

Chorus

Why is it a crime if I decide to share my smile with you

Here I wallow in my thoughts

Just hoping I will soon break loose

****

I never even got the chance to explain

Now there’s local news alerts and orders of restrain

How will I ever tell my mom?

I’m sleeping on a bed with no lumbar support

Breakfast lunch and dinner here are really a bore

Tallies on the wall and lyrics to this song

Hoping that I won’t be here for long

Chorus

Why is it a crime if I decide to share my smile with you

Here I wallow in my thoughts

Just hoping I will soon break loose

© 2018 SmorgShow Productions, Music and Lyrics by Phillip Donald

Original words and music by Ally Bockay

Original words and music by Ally Bockay

Original Words and Music by Ally Bockay

Phillip Donald’s New CD, “For the Kiddies” will be released this fall.  In the meantime, enjoy the brand new single “Hide and Seek”.

This is the first original work from Phillip Donald since 2011’s classic “Such a Good Ugly Thing“, which debuted at #671 on the Bulgaria pop charts and yielded such hits as “Revenge Time”, “Shut Your Face” and “I’d Rather Eat All Day”.

Now Phillip has returned to the scene with a collection of children’s songs which will certainly join the ranks of other classics by Peet Seeger, Woody Guthrie, and Burl Ives.

This was recorded live at Waa Kee Sha park in Oswego, IL and was featured in the “Campfire S’Morgs” episode, number 57.   Singing with us on this track is Anthony Luperini, Judy Child, Baba Gonesh, Phillip Donald, and Granny Rose.   It was the first time we podcasted our show live to the world with our remote equipment.   It was a beautiful summer night and a great way to cap off Ally’s summer vacation.    We will likely do this again next year.

Here’s a treat for the old-time, loyal SmorgShow fans.   Chris and Ally remake “Mr. Brown Can Moo”, originally performed by the HPs on the Chris and Dave Smorgasbord show (Season 1 Episode 2, 9-18-82).   Lyrics taken from the Dr. Seuss classic children’s book and updated with 21st century sound effects!

After having performed this song live in public several times in the 1980’s, I finally decided to do a proper in-studio recording of this song.

This was entirely written by Peet McCain, circa 1983.

This is a re-make of the opening track from our 1982 album, “Cow Dung and Chicken Tongue”.   It was fun using 21st century technology to make this version.

Rap Song ’91 (1991) – It was my first year truly on my own (that is, no roommate and paying the bills all by myself). I was living in a downtown Chicago apartment right in the middle of all the action. However, Jerry and I were getting a little tired of all the uptight Streeterville girls and their attitude. So Jerry and I put together this song in about 20 minutes. We rap about bein’ dissed by one too many chicks.  This is taken from the ‘City Boyz’ video collection. Recorded in my downtown studio apartment in the fall of 1991.

The Days of Adolescence (1989) -My farewell song to the 1980’s.  A song about growing up and saying goodbye to teenage life. Just before entering the 1990’s I decided to write a song that captured the essence of that period. I tried to incorporate all the main highlights and low lights from that period of my life. Every thing mentioned in this song really happened. Lyrics wise, probably my best song. I just re-mixed it with some fancy new software to double my voice during the chorus and to get rid of Don Henley in the background. Couldn’t really do too much about my being off key.

Chris and Jerry record Rick Astley’s Strong Strong Man at Stratford Square Mall and overdub the original music video. Which version do you like better?

Jerry attempts this Bruce Springsteen classic at the Stratford Square Mall where you can select any song to sing over (karaoke style) and leave with a cassette tape of your masterpiece. We took the video camera along.

Strong Strong Man (1989) – We really loved to make fun of Rick Astley videos back during this time. So Jerry and I became ‘The Overconfident Jerks’ and did a cover of the classic Rick Astley number. We recorded this at Stratford Square Mall (1989). It was a pretty cool operation for its time. You could pick among thousands of songs and lay down your own voice tracks over the music. For about $10 you walked out with a cassette tape of your song. Here it is for your listening enjoyment.

Sympathy for the Deejay (1984) was written during Chris’s suspension from his radio show and was sort of a protest song about our General Manager, Fred Moore, not allowing us to express ourselves creatively as we wished.  In hindsight, nothing could be further from the truth.  Fred actually turned a deaf ear to most of our antics.  He was such a good sport for reading the rules he gave us during our final show which we lifted and used in this remixed version of the song.

This song is dedicated to WDGC-FM General Manager Fred Moore.

Slime (1982) – My first and only song about the environment. I’m not sure why I did this other than it was just an easy parody on the Alan Parsons Project song, “Time”.

This song really should never have been recorded. In fact, it technically wasn’t. I had written a poem in study hall on Groundhog Day back in 1982. I never put it on an official recording until the 20th anniversary version of ‘Cow Dung and Chicken Tongue’.

What you will hear in this clip is Dave and me during the last 10 minutes of our final radio show on August 17, 1984. This was our “encore” after pretending to sign off for good. We actually waited a few minutes after “signing off” (with dead air) before returning to the air to perform this number. It really is terrible, but worth including here.

The Black Cow (1981) – I’m not sure what we were thinking when this was written.  This is the very first all-original Chris and Peet song.  A bitter love song by two guys who hadn’t even had a date yet at the time this was recorded.  I was 14 or so when I recorded this the first time around. When I did the re-recording of this, my daughter figured out the tune and so she is accompanying me on this version. I think the words are as relevant today as when they were first written.

One of our very first parody songs. A song about cleaning up. Like the picture of the army of dust mites that I found? These things are in your pillow. Enjoy the song.

In 1982, we released a collection of our very own songs (mostly parodies of others) as a collection called “Cow Dung and Chicken Tongue”.  It was released again in 1984 once our voices had settled down from puberty.  It was later reissued in 2002 as a 20th anniversary edition with extra bonus tracks from the post radio years.